Truthfully, no.

This Chinese New Year's eve was spent camping out in the hospital lounge,
and a mad flurry to the mortuary and home and back to grandma's place to set up the funeral. Sitting at the void deck folding some 2 billion dollar hell notes and chuckling at jokes about the inflation rate in the afterlife. LOL. Some rituals, i suspect, are more to help the mourners than the mourned.

Much time for zoning out as the fingers went fold, press and flick. Inevitably, the mind wanders.
Is my lack of tears (in the midst of some very painful blubbering) a delayed reaction or a sign of a steel heart? Perhaps, I certainly can't tell yet. But there are worse deaths to die, and in worse ways.

So, Grandpa, i pictured you with a happy feast in the sky. You had (have? :)) your good ol' appetite back and were(are) fit as a fiddle, free to 'roam'. Fine food at the heavenly banquet and brazen jigs with the Lord of the dance. And just maybe, we can finally understand each other despite my gross ineptitude at dialect.

As far as i feel, you're just beginning a better life. Woohoo!